Wow, too many thoughts, too little time. Or at least that's my perception. I'm sure it's not actually true. I just get overwhelmed when my mind is actually awake: creating, processing, imagining and solving. If you've ever seen one of those rock polishing sets where you dump jagged chunks of rock into the tumbler and let them bounce around for a while before they come out as shiny and beautiful orbs of color, you've seen how my mind works. I'm constantly throwing sharp rocks inside my head (a great idea...) and shaking them up (or letting God shake them up) until they are somehow transformed into attractive, useful thoughts that I can express. (This is why I need a blog: so that I'm not constantly dumping my shiny rocks on whoever will listen! lol) I’m pretty sure Ali usually has to dig out from under a pile of them before she can go to bed, anyway.
One rock that's been bouncing around for a while came from a conversation I had with Kendra recently about friendship, the topic of her honors thesis project. We started talking about how we tend to want our friends to choose us -- essentially because it makes us feel wanted and needed and affirmed for who we are. I realized that it's definitely a natural tendency for me, too, to have a desire for people to want me and need me. Who doesn’t?
But, whenever I realize that I have a natural tendency, that’s usually a red flag for me. That realization always puts me on alert, because I have to wonder: have I discovered one of those natural tendencies that needs to be transformed into Christ-like character? In this case, I think I have. We receive the love of God so that we can love. Can we be secure enough in Christ’s love to feel affirmed, even if our friends haven’t called us as much as we would have liked this week? Could we even be secure enough to go first in extending that love to them? Waiting around for someone to love you seems kind of silly when you know that you’re already loved with an unconditional and everlasting love, and you have the ability to give that gift to another person.
So, instead of bemoaning the fact that we wish our friends would call us and waiting for them to take the step to let us know that we’re wanted and needed, we should be the ones stepping out to let them know that we want and need them. Imagine the joy in their hearts when they realize that someone has gone out of their way to let them know they’re loved -- even though they don’t think they’ve done anything to deserve it. What could be a clearer representation of Christ-like love? Friendships are a way to share the love of Christ with others, which means living humbly and putting the needs and interests of others ahead of our own. (Philippians 2) How beautiful would it be if we started living out this kind of humble love with our friends?
Well said dear!
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