So, it’s been quite a while since I updated anything except an occasional facebook status. I feel like my life has gone supernova: glimmering points of light, phases of explosive transition, engulfing darkness, screams silenced by the vacuum of inevitability, black holes of emotion, both the good and bad kind. (I guess there are good and bad black holes anyway.)
That’s the thing about supernovas. You never know exactly when they’ll occur or exactly what form they’ll take. All you know is that they’re powerful, unstoppable, beautiful and yet destructive forces of nature. I’d been expecting a change, a big change, in my life -- even predicting one -- but I think I was still expecting that I’d be able to control some aspect of it. I guess it will take a lifetime to learn that my life is not my own. In the midst of it all, I keep expecting life to “settle down,” and I just keep drinking Starbucks and eating donuts and driving with the windows down like life is normal. Now that I think about it, I guess it just is what it is.
I’ve learned a lot of lessons lately. Like, you can’t take a vacation from life; you just have to face it.
And just because someone expects something of you doesn’t make it the right thing.
Communication makes and breaks relationships.
You can’t force someone to feel the love you have for them, no matter how strongly you feel it.
People come into your life for a reason, and sometimes they leave, too, without a reason that you can understand.
My daddy was right: you can’t change people, but God can.
My families, both spiritual and by blood, are always there to catch me.
Not everything that looks like a big issue, is actually a big issue. And that applies to most issues.
You can’t put a time limit on the grieving process. It just happens when it happens.
My parents left me three of the greatest pieces of wisdom:
You don’t have to be “called.” Wherever you see God at work, that’s your invitation to join Him.
Do the last thing God told you until He tells you to do something else.
Expectations are tricky things, and uncommunicated ones only lead to disaster.
People who copy you or accuse you of copying them are just insecure.
Sometimes there really isn’t anything to say, but everything to do.
My toughest experiences are not only for my good, but for the comfort of someone else.
Feelings come and go, but real friends stay close and pray.
You can make it through pain you never imagined with Christ-esteem, but you’ll sink to the depths of despair if you’re holding onto self-esteem.
Just some things that have been on my mind lately. I think I'm going to get another cup of coffee and stay in my pajamas.
